Memoirs

When I told my wife I needed a second wife…

Last October, I told my wife, Esther, that I planned to take a second wife. She argued, pleaded, and fought against the idea. She called everyone she thought could dissuade me, but nothing worked.

She reached out to my parents and hers, even involving our pastor. She went so far as to speak to my boss at work. When none of that worked, she threatened me with divorce. Big mistake! Not even our 23 years of marriage could change my mind about marrying my sweet Becky.

I’m the man of the house; I decide what I want and what happens in my family. No one can intimidate me. When I set my mind on something, I go through with it. Becky would be my new bride, no matter what. Come rain or shine, I was determined.

How could anyone ask me to give up my sweet Becky? She’s my everything. Everything about her is perfect. A complete package.

It’s not that I don’t love Esther anymore, but she’s getting old. In fact, she is old. I needed fresh blood—someone with a flawless figure, no stretch marks, and a flat tummy.

I wanted a young woman who would wear sexy outfits every night, not one who wraps herself in a PDP and CWO wrapper. Though Esther tried to change, wearing some sexy dresses, she couldn’t compete with my sweet Becky. Becky was all I needed to live a long and happy life.

So, I told Becky last week that I was coming to see her parents to start the marriage process. They asked me to come today to collect the marriage list.

I went and got the list… The family demanded that I buy her a plot of land in Abuja, a cow, a car each for her mother and father, pay for her elder brother’s medical school, buy an iPhone 14 for every member of her family, and complete the house her grandfather was building before he died. And finally, they asked for a cash sum of N2.5 million.

After going through the list, I suddenly realized how young and beautiful Esther really is. How sexy her stretch marks are, and how perfect her body still is.

Who needs Becky when I have my delicious Esther? My kuri Peturi. Oh, sweet Esther, I am yours, and you are mine. In fact, we are ours forever.

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